Tantrums, Sunday and a Breakthrough

So it's been awhile since I've posted but there has been a lot going on! I'll just say this. Autism is not for the weak or faint of heart! I'm beinning to see that I can no longer be weak and faint of heart if I'm going to be an awesome advocate and a great mom for Seth.

It's Sunday and we woke up late. We had exactly 60 minutes to get ready, eat breakfast and get in the van to head to church. A time cruch and Autism don't always go together. Breakfast went well, the kids got dressed and we were doing well, then it was time to put on Seth's shoes. Apparently there is an order to putting on his shoes. It's not an order that I know, but in Seth's mind I was doing it wrong. Now Seth can't tell me his special order, but he sure can let me know when I've done it wrong. So the shoes got on in the wrong order and the tantrum broke loose. He was screaming, crying and biting and hitting and kicking. I was dodging feet, arms, and teeth, all the while trying to remember that he really doesn't understand. I showed him his pictures to help him remember that we don't hit, or kick or bite...that only made it worse. He knows the rules. In his mind I'm the one that broke the rules by putting his shoes on wrong. So for the next 15 minutes we battled. I kept telling him to calm down, that I loved him and that I wasn't giving up and he battled. Then finally...it was done. Whew we made it through another one. We always stop after tantrums and make Seth tell us he's sorry. We know that mostly he is repeating what we say, but we've always known one day he will get it. TODAY was that day! After the tantrum and the hitting etc...he stopped, wiped his tears and hugged me and said "Sorry for hitting Mommy." Oh words that melt my heart! HE GETS IT! He knows it's wrong to hit. We made progress. We've had a breakthough! Then off to church. All went well until he started flipping light switches. I removed him from the situation and once again full battle mode. It was a good 20 minutes of tantrum. But once again he does understand. I keep telling him I'm not giving up I know there's a boy behind the tantrums and he hears me and somewhere in his brain he knows his Mommy and Daddy are going to move heaven and earth to get him what he needs so he can become all God has created him to be. My son has Autism...but we will not let Autism win!